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Healing a broken heart ♥ Saturday, January 31, 2009
at 11:48 PM HELLO MALAYSIA :D ! hee tortoise . o.O ~ the neck so long de >.> ! 60 years old tortoise ! so big ! (statue of raffless-- *coughs* Mr.Tortoise i mean) . this is one turtle that cant get up after it's overturned . hoo ~ breezy (7am) . glaring rays of light ! (10am) gentle wind ~ lovely winding expressways ~ (2pm) (depiction of natural geography) my geog teacher must be happy to see me taking pics of natural landscapes . ITS SO FINE ~ boring during the nice bumpy ride =x . v blurry ))): . pacific ocean !! (nah , just between the straits of sg and msia =x , (6.50am) 12am , GOODBYE MALAYSIA !mummy dragged me out of my bed today at 5am ): . changed to today's clothes and fell back in bed =x . was like 5.30am then got dragged out of bed AGAIN >< . went down to meeting point with others and waited for BAS PERSIARAN (tour bus) to come . took the seats . sat beside sis . kor and dasao were behind us . neighbour and her hubby were infront of us . it was funnnnnnn setting off . then mum's friend come bid goodbye lehs ! so sweet right ! bus set off finally at 6am . nice ride to singapore's custom immigration :D . and i suddenly remembered i should sms alvin D:< . managed to send 2 sms to him -.- . but then the 3rd one was too late , already pass msia infra structure le ! SingTel become Celcom and Maxis and DiGi ):< . means i cant sms alvin anymore ! #(@&$(#@$ . oh well ):< ! first stop ! eat breakfast at selangor coffeeshop . there damn alot of ppl okay ! as usual , ate kaya bread with milo o.o . lol . we ate like coolies together :D . but happily . after we've eaten , we returned to the bus . and proceeded to 2nd stop after everyone is back . 2nd stop which is a visit to Dragon Temple in selangor or batu pahat , forgot . im totally terrified by the fire on the candles and joss sticks' ashes ): THEY BURNS ! spent 1 hour there whining to my mummy nonstop to bring me back to bus . aw but she didnt allow me to . she told me to go one corner and wait for them . THEN I CAUGHT SIDE OF SUPER ULTRA BIG CUTE ADORABLE TORTOISEEEES ! aw ^-<> bought some veggies and threw them down bits by bits to feed them . they snatch for the veggies nehs ):< style="color: rgb(255, 204, 255);">heartpain . and just right D:<> fourth stop ! LADIES' FAVOURITES -.- (definitely not mine ..) SSSSSSSSSSSHOPPING ! (oh no LOL) . the girls and boys there are -.- generally prettier than singaporeans . but not so because they dress like christmas trees ! cant stand them ! saw this chinese fat girl . super fat thighs and yet wearing short skirts WTF ! LOL . *censored* . walked the shopping mall in circles -.- then finally time up . back to bus . 5th stop - a visit to birdnest factory ! i saw in real how swallows make bird nest O.O . cute lor :D ! actually nothing much , just find them cute . 6th stop - visit to moomoo farm . cows are adorable :D especially the babies ones )): . saw how they milk the cow with machines O.O scary . hugged one baby cow about my size =x . ): why cant i ride on cows ! 7th stop and last stop ! dinner celebration + lao yu shen ! nicenice and yuckyucky food . great and sucky singing performance . i wonder why teenagers in msia choose to work at 15 , 16 , 17 years old ? or are they being forced to ? what a slave country . lol . whatever . AND FINALLY :D JOURNEY TO SG CUSTOM AND BACK TO HOME . cant tell you much cos i fell asleep because i was too tired :D . lovely weekend ~ P.S : I don't miss Alvin . <--- see big big . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 12:04 AM i cant forsee the future with just a miasma shrouding within . i cant survive alone . just very baffled now . i have ALOT of problems -.- ! since i know where i have stood for the past one month . i can gladly go for my aims and give up some . failure .. i dont have much confidence . but i have a feeling that my geog , f&n and chinese isnt going to churn out well . keep getting myself entangled in riddles of love . what a neverending maze and journey that i can never complete alone . just hate myself for being vulnerable to these weaknesses . they never fail to pin me down in times of crisis . im sick of being a puppet .. =l . why is he still appearing in my mind ... someone give me a love potion that can clear all memories . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Friday, January 30, 2009
at 7:25 PMbloody boy . why do you keep attracting my attention ): ! you must be tired huh ? you've been running around in my mind ): .. where have you been ? pronounced missing in my life .. i just stop wishing that you were here . the moment you walked away from me . i miss you .. i miss you .. please get out of my mind ... oh buddha kill me now ):< . boy , what have you done to my heart ! its tearing me apart .. Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 4:35 PM  mehhhs ))): what a day . results are back =l . did physics test today , it was freaking gosh-ly hard ! i think i'd get a fail for my physics . AND amazingly this lil uptown girl here finally passed her maths by abit :D ! well , at least not so depressing D: . from a F9 to C6 =x though more efforts needs to be put in <~ by teacher -.- . POA : 95/100 (A1) GEOGRAPHY : -to be updated- ENGLISH : 60/100 (B3) CHINESE : -to be updated- F&N : -to be updated- E-MATHS : 54/100 (C6) CHEMISTRY : 80/100 (A1) SOCIALSTUDIES : -to be updated- PHYSICS : -to be updated- i wonder how's alvin doing in NS o.O ? sounded fun when hearing from him =l . grenade goes boom f3 ! k i really wanna try out NS ): LOL ! ^-<> hope you see this post alvin :P jiejie ~ Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Thursday, January 29, 2009
at 3:44 PMpssh =x im secretly sneaking online and using the computer . gotta make this post fast . will be sleeping all day cos alvin and samuel(lim) are not online ): . today's incident was fuck one . i had no time to complete 3 5 marks question in chinese test ): ! screwed mans , now i can forget about A1 ! what the hell .. other bands got extra time while band 2 doesnt . -.- ... anyway i was remembered of something that happened last week . it was P.E period , our class had captain's ball . i was on the losing team =x (obviously) . and yet our team scored 7:9 although lost . but i turned the result from 2:7 to 7:9 with the 2 boys' help lehs ! got 1 super embarrassing moment during that game -.- ! the ball come knock me , my hair messed up . so i tied my hair . and that boy (idk name but still remember his face) threw the ball at me . i dont think he did it purposely . i think it was because he wanted and trusted that i could catch it D: . or rather he mistakened that i was wanting to catch it by raising both my hands up D: ! super embarrassing can ! anyway .. here's my pathetic result -.- .. (its dam jialat can ..) POA : 95/100 (A1) GEOGRAPHY : -to be updated- ENGLISH : 60/100 (B3) CHINESE : -to be updated- F&N : -to be updated- E-MATHS : -to be updated- CHEMISTRY : 80/100 (A1) SOCIALSTUDIES : -to be updated- PHYSICS : -to be updated- as you can see my best subject plunged drastically . oh mans . no more love . study study study . buck up jingjing ! aim for all As , and i believe you can do it . F3 =x . getting back F&N and E-Maths result tomorrow probably . wish me all the best . loves and bye ! Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Tuesday, January 27, 2009
at 10:56 PM          mooo ~ =x happy niu year :D . back from visiting my korkor and dasao . dad drove us to bukit panjang . despite the eerie atmosphere there , theres many kids playing with firecrackers =x (small ones) . watched pocachontas and moneynotenough2 at there . mne2 the movie was dam sad la despite my 17th time watching it . near to tears but since everyone was there -.- i held my tears back and reduced it to a small line of moisture in my eyes :P . bleahs . was boring although , then i listened to mp3 while smsing alvin . lol , hes booking in to army bunk tonight (HE SAY DE) . then he kept saying "B > jing's photo" -.- ? WHAT THE HELL ALVIN ! you already got your v seductive girls pic alr lor . k la . school days im too lazy and busy to sms you . weekends im probably gunbounding or dfing . maybe im free then ill sms you so dont be surprise if you see this post >.> . AND im not being concerned about you ! lol , think too much alr . f3 . okay , will miss you A LITTLE BIT lor . tatas =l another week to see jing again :D . *vanishes* Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Monday, January 26, 2009
at 8:35 PMchinese new year visiting is officially over for me . at first i really hated it like no more but again . the fact that i only meet them once a year is like heartbreaking . why are we called relatives and blood related people to each other , when we are scattered so faraway from each other ? yeah , they're gone . their backs fading and shrinking as each step is taken . kinda miss them although they caused mess and havoc . its not something i get to experience everyday . my biao jie(s) - XiaoHui , XiaoBi , LiHui . my biao ge(s) - (forget name rofl but known as AhBoy duh) . my tang jie(s) - (QianQian , HanHan , LingLing) . my tang di(s)- (Ren Jie) . and idk who issit but i think is my nephew . his name is ZhengKai but since young i called him kaikai . hes weird can ? all stared at my com because of my lv 142 bishop LOL . and him . listening to music and smsing all the time . like dont listen = will die . aiya he smsing his gf probably . must find time to suan him HAHA ! goodbye 2008 , i wont look back but i will await others to come . let us bid farewell with not regrets but happiness and anticipation . thats all for today . loves . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 12:39 AM a special story . - on 2006 14 february there was this boy named yangyang , he came back from school and saw his older sister outside his home with her boyfriend . and then he walked in the house , his puppy ran to him excitedly . yang's mum : 洋洋 , 快帮我到楼下去买米酒！ yang : orh , 是的，妈 。 - and then he went down to the grocery store with his puppy .  - while walking there , he said something to his puppy .  yang : 情人节每个人都有节目。只有我没有。puppy : *woof* 那为什么你不去找适合你的人呢？ yang : *hmph* 我的是你不用管。 - when they reached the grocery store , yang bought two bottles of rice wine . and was prepared to pay for it already . then ..  counter girl : 欢迎观临！yang : err , 你好。中共多少？ counter girl : 三块。还有，这个送你。  - the counter girl smiled and gave him an ice cream .he blushed and walked out of the store . - his puppy asked him . puppy : 他就是你要找的人了！ yang :哎呀，我的是你别管啦。 puppy : 为什么？ yang : ... - yang walked down the ally street , holding the ice cream amongst the cool ebony black night . the wind was blowing as his puppy tailed him from behind . yang seems to be deep etched in his thoughts , thinking of something . - 10 minutes later , yang was about to reach his home . his puppy barked for him to come out of his thoughts . puppy : *woof* 你再想什么？ yang : *shows the ice cream* yang : 你看. yang : 爱情就像一个雪糕,今天不吃,明天就没了. yang : *holding tears* 就算有人主动送给你 ,你也不一定吃得到阿 ...  - the end ... ~ Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 12:35 AM   HAPPY NEW YEAR to all blog readers ! may all excel for your future endeavours :D . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Saturday, January 24, 2009
at 10:34 PMcontent disclaimer : to those who doesnt understand you can choose to ask me in person sorry about it being in chinese translation . if the wordings are too small , just copy (clt+c) it and paste onto somewhere and read (: . 午夜的收音机轻轻传来一首歌 , 那是你我都已熟悉的旋律 , 在你遗忘的时候我依然还记得 , 我早已经了解追逐爱情的规则 . 虽然不能爱你却又不知该如何 , 相信总会有一天你一定会离去 , 所有的故事只能有一首主题歌 , 我知道你最后的选择 . 所有的爱情只能有一个结果 , 我深深知道那绝对不是我 , 既然曾经爱过又何必真正拥有你 , 即使离别也不会有太多难过 . these words are from the bottom of my heart . i find chinese more meaningful and it carries more feelings . i hope you know that im waiting , for you to realise it . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 5:42 PM have YOU made up your new year resolutions yet ?! not very picky , not very demanding . here's my list =x . (studies) 1. a 60+ for my maths . 2. a 100 for POA if possible . 3. a 70+ for my chinese . 4. a 50+ for geog . 5. a 70+ for english . (self resolution) 1. be 40kg . 2. not so emo anymore . 3. tears-free . 4. dont procrastinate too much . 5. grow to 158 cm . 6. i dont want my fat ass ! - ; The hole we've dug for ourselves will only sink deeper . lastly my last resolution is that , i hope my mum would be proud of me , at least for the first and last time , because ive really tried my best , or rather im trying already . i may sound stupid but nonetheless this is what i should do as a daughter . just want to give my all to , improving my maths , perfecting my english foundation , and poa concepts . dad , if youre reading this , please explain to mum because shes illiterate . alas ive finally found someone whom i can fight and give my all for (mum) . i dont care what you all say to me , because what matters is myself . and daddy chua , if youre reading this (i dont think you will be) , i want to let you know that after 5 years of struggle , after leaving you as a student , im finally able to depend on myself and work for the sake of myself . i learnt to survive alone , to rely on myself gradually . i know its not too late and youll be proud of me , because i think you know that ive never been independent before . i now am . i am finally free . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 3:38 PM 我爱上你了。 不能这样走下去。 我知道我最后的选择。 我要离开，虽然舍不得。 我还深爱着你。 但我觉得我不配。 不配得到你的爱。 millions of things flushing through my mind . you .. im thinkin' of you . dont you ever know ? there are times when i kept saying goodbye . the only time when i look into your eyes , all i could think about is you . when that time i was about to tell the truth . i didnt see the feelings you once hide , and now you're saying goodbye . i tried to hide . you're my joy , you're my pride . because .. 我的心，从来没离开过你。 and everytime i close my eyes , i see your face . this infatuation will never be erased , you can never be replaced . you know i still care for you , you know im still thinking of you . ive been trying too hard , im feeling too hurt .. the way you said you dont want to , tell me why .. why dont you ? Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Friday, January 23, 2009
at 7:03 PM     the last time ever i see my sunset alive .im a happy and sad girl . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 6:48 PM the cny concert there was a song . i think the song's name is just so you know . damn touching lol . almost cry can ! im thinking about this particular guy la . i think im being v selfish , arent i ? you know why i fell for you in the first place ?! do you ?! because i wanna make school life interesting to myself . then i knew that i have to do something . and i decided on forcing myself to have a crush on you . i think im really v selfish . i shouldnt do this from the start at all . dont leave me as a friend . cant help it . tried my best to let go and i succeeded . living with the past is painful . retribution ... flash back of you kills meeeeeeeeeeee ! why do you keep appearing in my mind ! why , leave me alone T-T ! I HATE MYSELF . I DOWAN TO LOVE ! THIS IS SO PAINFUL . MAKE MY HEART DEAD , SOMEONE . 就是因为我的心，从来没有离开过你。 Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 6:08 PM finally finished my homework and patching maple to v67 . but then was really fucking lag inside . i heard that sg ppl say sg net got problems and cant maple alr . i was like wtf ? what do i get from this hardwork LOL ? i dont care . i just wanna maple and i want to revive my sunset no matter what okay ? yes i miss my sunset alot =l . i miss sunset poa test result is out : ranked 3rd in class . 38/40 which is converted to 95/100 . anyway . today's school was fun lol . sat infront of boon heng and beside minghui . watch the CNY concert . quite crappy but overall nice ? then lol . the singing was freak ! mr wong voice break will zao sia de ! it was then i remembered mr chng had reminded us to bring back all of our books . i was like thinking .. why ? what the hell ? why are you freaking torturing us ? we aint NS men ? we are very busy and tired already ? stop it alright ? why are you all always against us students ? whats wrong with keeping our books under the table ? do you have a problem with that ? why arent you happy ? do you expect us to listen to you ? you are so demanding and ridiculous , you know ? why cant you leave us alone ? you know that we students are not slaves ? why do you keep doing this to us ? does this even do anything good to you all ? i think we will study when we need to ? theres no use forcing us anyway ? let us go , will you ? Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ Sunday, January 18, 2009
at 11:08 PM"the moment i look into your eyes ; it was like i've lost my defences .. " im going to bed alr . 5 more days before im back again [: . take care all . loves . I LOVEYOU . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ at 6:36 PM   -         to all people that knows me , i have shifted to www.eternity-regrets.blogspot.com ! please kindly relink asap :D . and i have finally took time off to edit dead links . and to that very person (you-know-who) , if you're expecting me to come to you and BEG you to change the password back , im sorry but to disappoint you , im much cleverer than you are . so the final quote to describe you is . "your intelligence matches that of an avian" . LOL ! toodles peeeeps ~ another week of schooling is arriving soon . its time to kick ass in school and wreck havoc [: . -jj . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ |
♥ Search ♥ Yours truly   Baelia Alistair Pan. Single/ I'll NEVER be available! My heart's preoccupied I'm currently 15 Queensway Sec Scorpio 14 November's my birthday! I'm a crybaby Mad about LOVE Don't step over my limit She loves to sing! I'm fun! I like to play! Divided in two Blur as a sotong I needs lots of love and concern I'm just like a cat :D I love attention <3 Dont judge me from the outside Cause you dont understand ME . ♥ Loves ♥ Freedom ♥ Cookies ♥ Cheese ♥ Chocolates ♥ Chilli ♥ Movies ♥ Dates ♥ Loathe Hypocrites Backstabbers Betrayers Gossiping Debates Criticisms Love triangles Marriage Fast foods ♥ Desires Freedom Top10 in class Unlimited money t spend No curfew More time t hang out More pets! Change for th better Get t Sec4 Express ♥ Chains 3O1'O9 Aiko Alvin/Pegasi ChengBoon Chiwen/PurplePixies Claud Daniel Felicia Grace Janice/MissyJANx3 Jeanne JiaYuan Kenneth Marc/zxDarkFlamexz Melissa Naruto Nicholas Pavithra PingFang SamuelTeo Sequoias Guild Blog Shaun/x3Crisis Shirley Shuean Simon Terencee/xXxXShadowxX Vanessa WeiLiang XinYi XinYu Yaozhi YunTing/Krugal93 ZiLing/JuniorPixie ♥ Make some noise! ♥ Dance t th music!
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at 11:48 PM