Healing a broken heart ♥


Friday, February 13, 2009
at 5:20 PM


last few moments with instructors Naz and Fang .

on the way back , with heavy regrets in our mind .

their smiles were hiding tears , their joy was faked .

i hate to leave .. ): .

savouring every moment we can ..

im just like a lamp post on the street , its you who made me worthwhile .

thoughts flushing our minds . "can we dont leave , please instructor ?"

do we really have to do this ?

the last day of the camp .

the 2nd day of the camp .

when leaving .. some left happily but cried .. some left crying .. some left being empty .

we still have to let go .

thanks for the care , encouragements and little bits of comments to change me to a better person . its time to leave and we may cry ; today we're here , and to say goodbye ; its time to part and carry on with life , so lets rid ourselves of worries and pass on the joy . - Naz .

first day of camp - minghui playing with my toy .

it reads : Children in the dark causes accidents ; Accidents in the dark causes children .

this is for you , its my heartfelts , on valentines ill give you 100 roses , 99 real and 1 fake , my love for you is 100% , and i will love you till the last one dies . (to no one)

heart breaking puffs that drew me near to tears when i flashed back the past .

watery eyes >.>

THE CAMP IS DAMN TOUCHING AND TOUGH . ITS AN EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN FOR ME . SOME OF YOU MAY SEE ME CRYING BUT WHATEVER , IM NOT BEING A CRYBABY BUT IM REALLY FEELING REAL GUILTY AND SAD . THANKS FOR ALL WHO CARED AND THOSE WHO DIDNT , BECAUSE YOU HAVE WOKE ME UP TO BE SELFLESS YET AGAIN .

.. i will miss you all ..


- flash backs -

day 1 :

gathering in school , meeting our instructors , ice breaking with the class , and leaving for the camp site .
the campsite journey , the personal introduction , the arrival at the campsite .

we went to play rope swing over , rebirth , prepared for the campfire and practiced dance moves .
was really tiring and sweaty . didnt get to bathe until near lights off which was 11.30pm .

but we were happy .


day 2 :

rise and shine : 6am .
morning exercise : starjump and buddha claps :P .
breakfast : meesiam and cheecheongfan !

activities : flying fox (zipline) , ab sailing , rock wall , canoeing , jump tight rope .

lunch : (cant remember but the cucumber tasted like grass) .
dinner : (sweet and sour fish with rice and almond pudding)
i cried during the dinner time . it was so heartbreaking . cried till headache and my eyes were bloodshot as described by friends . i didnt meant to cry , just cant help it .

rushed for the bathrooms with avril and amira after canoeing .
smell so nice after all .

supper : chocolate cakes .

day 3 :

rise and shine : 7am
morning exercise : shouting cheers (lol !) .
breakfast : NASI LEMAK ! OMG YUMMY .
area cleaning : 2 girls toilet zzz -.- .

and the worst of all the girls toilet is in a MESS .
about 2 cubicle is flooded with (you know what) and used sanitary pads .
AND THE WATER CAME RUSHING OUT !

andandand there was DEAD lizards in the sink !
i had to pick them out because jerald/gerald was scared of them LOL .
and of cause he had to pull the (you-know-what) out from the toilet bowls omg ew .
and finally .. sparkling clean but smells not so nice yet .
spent about 3 hours cleaning , scrubbing , washing , pushing to get the whole toilet clean .

and farewells / reflection at parade square .
bid goodbye , and off we go , the end of our fate .
there's always a next time ,
but what concerns is that who we get to be with .

thanks Naz and Fang . *hugsssss )): !!* cant bear to part but i did in the end .
was a fountain of neverending tears .. and heartbreaking moments .

to naz : thanks for calling me XINGXING ): WHAT GORILLA . you wont be able to know my real name because i gave you my nick . you wont and youll never know . this is goodbye , you have showed me a better way to live my life and that wont be all .

and to fang : thanks for consoling me when i was really down . at times i may be rebellious and naughty , but afterall we made up the ever and most spontaneous and active 301 during the camp . loves and farewells .

Sorry,
I forced myself t walk away from you ♥




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Baelia Alistair Pan.
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