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Healing a broken heart ♥ Saturday, February 14, 2009
at 5:32 PMmy life is stained by painful memories ;  thinking back , i did have some true loves with me .
but i dont know what happened . my english standard has been plunging drastically . im in a quandary . i am thinking . i am still thinking . i wanna cry out loud . my body aches after the sec3 camp . my skin turned purple and looked like its about to fall off . i hate sunburns . i shouldnt have helped carrying the canoes with keesiang . im watching everyone going out for date . my , im so alone . can someone slap me awake ? but i adores being single . can someone tell me , whether is freedom or love more important ? this girl here cant stand tied up . i dont want to be caged ... let me out .. im thinking of what to type . im typing what i have thought . this is my how many lines ? this is my 24th line . im restricting myself from chocolates and all . if not i will have a recurring pimple attack . its recovering pretty fast (im shocked) . maybe its because i stuffed down veggies and fruits , during the camp when im CRYING during dinner time . its the most heartbreaking dinner ive ever eaten . thoughts flashing back in my mind , no longer able to hold back the tears . its the first time ive ever cried in a camp in my 15 years of life . whats wrong with myself , now please tell me . i concur with those that says im crazy or mentally unstable . am i of any difference compared to those insane ones ? why do my face feel wet now ? am i crying ? no i dont think i am . the sky is . why is it raining now ? is heaven taking sympathy on me ? why is this happening to me ? let me go . alot of things happened . i just realised that im no longer a happy girl . my life has changed . my personality has morphed to someone i dont even know who am i . but why ? i refused to budge . but i know i can never make it . im laying down and breathing as long as i still lives .. this is what a guy said to me today , you know who you are . but i dont have the courage to accept you . i dont want to hurt you . "100 roses for my valentine , 99 real and 1 fake ; my love for you is 100% , i will love you till the last one dies ." i have been your friend since JingJing is born in this world . maybe thats fate , maybe it isnt . but i can only tell you one thing . i will hurt you deeper , im just like a rose , but a rose with thorns . no matter how you hold me , you will still bleed . i cannot accept you . i have no courage to accept this love . im not the right girl . silly , theres always a next time . no doubt , you are right . 3 years ago i do have slight feelings for you . but i was still too young to realise what is it . now i understood that strange feeling . but its too late . ive left it hoping and burning in one corner . now it has died . im sorry ... the truth is , even if this feeling didnt die . i still wouldnt accept your love . because i dont belong to you , i dont belong to you at all , before i dont , now i dont , never i will . "If , out of time i could pick a moment and keep it shining , always new , of all the days that i have lived , i'd pick the moment i met you <3> - winning dedication of today's event . Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ |
♥ Search ♥ Yours truly   Baelia Alistair Pan. Single/ I'll NEVER be available! My heart's preoccupied I'm currently 15 Queensway Sec Scorpio 14 November's my birthday! I'm a crybaby Mad about LOVE Don't step over my limit She loves to sing! I'm fun! I like to play! Divided in two Blur as a sotong I needs lots of love and concern I'm just like a cat :D I love attention <3 Dont judge me from the outside Cause you dont understand ME . ♥ Loves ♥ Freedom ♥ Cookies ♥ Cheese ♥ Chocolates ♥ Chilli ♥ Movies ♥ Dates ♥ Loathe Hypocrites Backstabbers Betrayers Gossiping Debates Criticisms Love triangles Marriage Fast foods ♥ Desires Freedom Top10 in class Unlimited money t spend No curfew More time t hang out More pets! Change for th better Get t Sec4 Express ♥ Chains 3O1'O9 Aiko Alvin/Pegasi ChengBoon Chiwen/PurplePixies Claud Daniel Felicia Grace Janice/MissyJANx3 Jeanne JiaYuan Kenneth Marc/zxDarkFlamexz Melissa Naruto Nicholas Pavithra PingFang SamuelTeo Sequoias Guild Blog Shaun/x3Crisis Shirley Shuean Simon Terencee/xXxXShadowxX Vanessa WeiLiang XinYi XinYu Yaozhi YunTing/Krugal93 ZiLing/JuniorPixie ♥ Make some noise!  ♥ Dance t th music!
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