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Healing a broken heart ♥ Wednesday, November 25, 2009
at 3:13 AMI miss you, dear Cancerian.
You won't freaking know how I'm feeling right now. I know it clearly. Prefect camp today till 26 nov. So you won't be able t go out & have a heart t heart talk. Sorry. I've always been so doubting. I admit that I don't trust you. & I still don't. - Why? Becos you've left me feeling insecure. & why must *they* make it as though you two are destined? I don't trust you. So I asked someone else. Me : Hey, ***, is there prefect camp today? *** : I'm sick sorry, but I think have ley. Me : Who else you know is going? *** : Hazel. I saw her wearing prefects tee. - What's wrong w this conversation? Let me show you what's so wrong. "*** : Hazel. I saw her wearing prefects tee." - Why her again? - I don't get it. Why can't we be like what we were in th past? I really want t trust you. But I just CAN'T. I don't know who t trust. My suspicions or you? How can I possibly trust you when you tell me these? "Me : Let's be just friends. Okay?" You didn't reply. I just DON'T know what else you want. "Me : Okay. You've made your choice. I'll get out of your life this moment. Good luck w hazelteo. Forget me." "Max : Stop say that hazel name. She so disgusting. I'm still your dear." "Max : Don't want then ok loh." What's your problem? What's w th "ok loh"? "Me : I want t hear it from your heart, not you. Do you love me for what I AM and not what I WAS?" "Max : Not sure." You go die la! I'm not a toy! Fuck you! "Me : Okay. I give you 1 LAST chance. Meet me at (place) at (time)." "Max : I got prefect camp lah." "Me : Then what you want me do?!" "Max : Next time lah. I got camp till 26nov." "Me : When?" "Max : When I free then I tell you bah." Fuck you hard! You so busy right?! Why don't you just say no?! I know you've t work & you got camp la! But don't expect me t make myself wait till you're fucking available! - Nabueys. (yes, this is th first time I've scolded NABUEYS in months!) Wanna know why I'm so pissed? Just look at what your indecisiveness has done. "Sorry. Last night I thought a lot after we went out. I should make it clear. I really don't like you anymore. I don't know what's going on but just that I don't have feeling for you like before. Nothing I can say other than sorry. So just forget me and cut it clear." "Oh yah, 1 last thing I want to tell you is, you should thank hazel because she's your friend. Cause she help me to say goodbye to you. If it's not for her, I also don't know I should break or not. Cause she asked me to make it clear with you so I can love her." - FUCK Y-------- Oh wait. There's MORE. "No actually. I hate that fat hazel. Forgive me k?" "No. I don't love her." "I say I hate her, not love her." Me : Whatever that makes you happy. z. "U." Me : What la. zz. "I love you." Me : HAHAHA. You do? "Not sure.:)" YOU GO BANG WALL LA! NOT SURE STILL SAY YOU LOVE ME! GROW UP CAN?! STILL GIVE ME SMILEY FACE! I PUNCH YOU LA! - Wtf. Playboy. I know why you hate hazel. Cos she called you a BASTARD. Yeah. Very right. YOU'RE A BASTARD LA. How can I possibly trust you, you tell me?! - I think you've got LOTS of explaining t do, maxy guy. Hanging on doesn't work, it'll not bring back what I was before. I'm myself. I know I can bring back th previous me. But before I do that, prove that you're worthy of me. Prove that you truly love me. - If I don't feel so, then you can dream on. & go be w someone that only treats/calls you a bastard. I like someone that looks EXACTLY like you. He has all your qualities. He behaves th same like you. Except that he's inhesitant & true. - I don't think you get it. It's a clue. Get it now? No? Here's another. - "I broke up w my ex just because he doesn't know how t make decisions" - Not enough? Here's th LAST one. - "My ex totally has no confidence & he doesn't know how t make choices." - *That's also th reason why I hate/despise most Taurus guys* Plain pathetic. God bless, k? - Enough of complaining. Contemplate my words, uncover th hints, understand my needs. I'm brutally straightforward, I know. At least I know how t make decisions. - Edit : I know you won't sms me (: cos you don't bother t. So, I'll forget abt this relationship. & move on. There's no need t apologise. Just get out of my life, max. Sorry, I forced myself t walk away from you ♥ |
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at 3:13 AM